Issues.

This month is a rough one. I'm having money problems because my vacation was unpaid. I initially tried to blame this all on the company, thinking they hadn't calculated correctly. Turns out it was me who hadn't. So my cheque was missing 35 hours, which is a LOT of money. So I'm barely scraping by this pay period, which sucks because I have to drive to work on Friday and pay for parking all day. Today we have a mandatory meeting, which actually isn't all that bad because then I can charge the company 4 hours for 2 hours of work. BUT, I have to get there, and since it's in the middle of a regular working day, I either drive and pay $10 for 2 hours of parking, or spend $5 taking the bus and back. Doesn't sound like much of a choice, does it? There isn't much of one, but it's going to be -18 for a high today, which means it will be a damn cold walk any way I look at it.

I don't mind so much putting up with the cold if it saves me money, but I hate even having to think twice about it. I promised myself I would be good with my credit card, and keep the balance low, and instead I owe $1300. When I get paid at the end of the month there will be a bit extra on there compared to normal because I worked a half stat on New Years Eve, and the whole stat on New Years Day. All that money is going on my credit card, plus more if possible. It's a rent cheque though, so I probably won't be able to do more than that little bit extra.

All this worrying about money is nothing compared to what my sister is going through. She got so far behind her bills that the phone company cut off her cell (it's the only phone she has) plus she's behind on the power bill, her credit card payments, her line of credit, everything. She FINALLY after many months of waiting got her cheque from EI, but when she deposited it into her bank they gave her $50 of it and held the other $550. She was planning on using that money to buy groceries and pay a huge chunk on her bills, but now she can't because the bank is holding it and she doesn't know for how long. Her stupid bank has now decided to randomly put holds on cheques for everyone apparently. I'm guessing this is because of the terrible economy, but that's not really fair to it's patrons. She was honest with them when she worked for the interior design company, and told them her $1700 cheque was going to bounce before it did. Her stupid boss didn't have enough money in her account to pay my sister. It turned out in the end that the cheque ended up clearing anyway, meaning it's been more than a year since she's had a bounced cheque, and yet right after that is when her bank starting 'randomly' holding cheques to see if they would clear. If that's what you get for being honest, I'll lie every time.

The poor girl is also trying to go to school, because her back is really tight right now, which means in the next month or so she will get hurt again. If that happens she will be back where she was before, where she can't pay any of her bills on time, gets behind, and on and on. If she gets hurt she won't be able to pay any bills down to a level where she can handle it, meaning she can't go to school to get a better job where her back won't be such a factor. I feel for her, because I have the same back issues, however I managed to get a job where I can sit down all day and don't really have to worry about it all that much. Or at least, that was the case before I moved here, where taking an extremely jerky bus could be the end of me.

Anyway, she can't afford to go to school, because she has to work part time hours which isn't enough to pay any of her bills, and yet she can't afford to keep working to pay off those bills because then her back will die and she'll be off work. This wouldn't be so bad if she had paid sick days, but her fucked up company doesn't pay for that time when you're sick, they just give you a bit extra on each cheque. She would have been out of sick days by now, but that's not the point.

So apart from declaring bankruptcy, which to me seems to be the only step, what can she do? She can't afford to work or go to school, and she can't afford to go to school. I guess she just has to keep going on the way she has been. Life sucks when you're broke. My god.

Back to my situation, though I'm not nearly as bad off as she is, I'm really not happy here. I hate paying so god damned much for parking, and don't make enough to consistently pay off the bills. Flashing forward when thinking about this, to a possible time when I might be able to afford it, it makes me think that I'd be swiping the credit card, thinking how much money I lose each month just on parking. Currently, I'm thinking that my credit card has a much larger balance than I want it to, and I really need to pay it off. Add to that the ridiculous rent that I should be sharing with a roommate (that I can't find anywhere in this city) plus the fact that I still owe my aunt for my damage deposit (which will weigh on my mind until it's been paid) I'm really feeling scared. Scared about my money situation, scared for my sister and her situation, just basically I'm not in a good place this week.

Sadly, I can't even get my nails done, because I can't afford the $45 to pay for it. Christ.

Sadness, missing everyone

I'm not sure what's happening to me this week, I'm really missing everyone in Kelowna. I just heard my sister's best friend is moving back to town, and remembering all the good times I had there makes me want to move back. Argh, I'm sure this is just a weak week and I'll be fine soon. I'm just not really making any friends here, so it's tough to enjoy my life. Yeah, that's why!